You are in the Dark

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You are, right now, alone in the Dark. Very far away from your home. The Dark is the place, where you don’t know anything, where you can barely understand the situation what is happening around you. The Dark sometimes touch you. Sometimes it wants to talk with you. After sometimes, you can’t understand – are you blind or you are still in the Dark. Sometimes you can’t understand – are you alive or still in the Dark. The Dark is the place, where are living your fears with dreams, secrets with pleasures, pains with hopes. The Dark is place, where you are sleeping on knifes without pillows. The Dark is place, where nobody knows who you really are.

But, how did you get here? How did you found this place? Or, how did the Dark found you? I think, it’s happened very easily. Like, one day the people around you started ignore and push away. They ignored your voice, your problems and your attention. They started don’t support you, to judge and laugh. The second step was to control you. You HAVE TO do that, you HAVE TO be quiet, you HAVE TO go and come, you HAVE TO smile, you HAVE TO apology, you HAVE TO understand, you HAVE TO muted yourself. Well… And you do that. You try to fix the situation or to fix yourself. You START to doubt yourself. Maybe you are really wrong and maybe you hurted someone. Well… It’s very big opportunity to manipulate people, who are very far away from homeland. It is very easy to blame you. You don’t know language, you don’t have friends, you look different, sometimes you don’t have money for lunch. And then, the Dark is coming. You feel lost, alone and guilty. The third step is – they start to punish you. It means, you really did something wrong. And now, you lost and blame yourself. For what? For some lies? But HOW some people can think, they can punish someone? HOW they can decide, who and how they will punish? It’s incredible, how people start feel strong and powerful. And it’s incredible, how fast you start to feel the Dark.

Why people do not believe in you? Because of your nationality, age, eyes colour or gender? Do they trust you less, because you are female? Why people do not support you? Because they are very busy, feel powerful, care about reputation? Why people invite foreigners? Why they do not care about them quality time, experiences, good memories and feelings? Well… It’s many questions.

Where is the Light?

The Light is everywhere, where are good emotions, obtained experience, support, friendly faces. The Light is where you are with friends. The Light comes, when you care about people and people care about you, when nobody makes gossip behind your back, when you feel safe.

But right now, you are in the Dark.

About Sarune Sidlauskaite

Labas! My name is Šarūnė and I am from Lithuania. I am 25 years old, and this August i started volunteering in Turkey, in Izmir. I am EVS volunteer, and working in Karşiyaka municipality. I hope this year will be wonderful. More about me - instagram @rozalibam ♥

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